How to Balance the Ego
Part 3 in an ongoing series on healing the ego
What weighs more: a ton of bricks or a ton of feathers?
We all know the answer--they weigh the same, but the mind's tendency is to vote for the bricks. What looks and feels like a weightier substance should have more value on the scale--even with all things being equal.
This is the same error the ego makes again and again with regard to a person's value. The person who looks or seems weightier/of more import is of more value, even though "we know this truth to be self-evident that all people are created equal" to quote our country's Declaration of Independence--with more equal gender language.
(Note: Even though our society has this ideal, in reality it is way out of balance here. For example, compare the wages of sports stars with teachers.)
But this belief--that all are equal--is exactly the tool needed to balance your own ego. The corollary--that everyone's gifts are also equal--is also a helpful belief. These beliefs are about value not about equivalency. I am not exactly the same as you. I have my unique gifts; so do you. But by nature we all have a divine spark and the same Source of genius, and therefore, we--and our gifts--are of equal value in the unfolding universe.
These beliefs are easy to assent to as ideals, but in practice our minds tend to make the bricks-over-feathers error. Here are ten quick tips to help you catch yourself and rebalance your own ego:
1) If you notice someone else's ego is bothering you, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: we are of equal value.
2) If you notice you are envious of another's success, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: we are of equal value.
3) If you notice yourself thinking that you are better or worse than someone else, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: we are of equal value.
4) If you don't think it's important to look for ego/shadow within, start looking at the part of you that thinks that--it's from ego/shadow and heal that part of you with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: We all have egos/shadows and we are all loved infinitely.
5) If you find self-disgust, self-hate, or self-denigration within, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: I am of infinite value.
6) If you find yourself exalting another or denigrating another, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: we are of equal value.
7) If you find yourself evaluating your gifts in comparison to another, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: all gifts are of equal value.
8) If you find yourself thinking that you are at a higher or lower spiritual/energetic level than another, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: all paths and levels are of equal merit.
9) If you find yourself thinking, "I'm right and they're wrong," heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: everyone is right and everyone is wrong.
10) If you find yourself thinking, "I'm the expert here. My gifts trump theirs," heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: everyone is an expert of something and all gifts are of equal value.
Okay, so you're seeing a theme here, right? The work is always to heal the ego with unconditional love and compassion. Then the balanced ego can easily and gently move into trans-ego, for when the self (small s) knows its infinite, eternal value, when its own genius is validated, and when it is receiving a never-ending supply of unconditional love, then, of course, nothing matters! Of course, all is well! Of course, I can merge/dissolve with All That Is. Of course, because it's all One, it's all Love. Of course, of course, all are equal, because all is Self (large S)!
When you can let go of comparing yourself and evaluating others, life becomes joyful and free. You live knowing everything and everyone is a blessing and a gift. What a great way to live!
Here are 5 signs of a healthy and healing ego:
1) Whatever qualities you regard in others (love, beauty, generosity, genius, special, etc.), you regard in yourself in equal amounts.
2) Whatever regard you give to yourself is also given in equal regard to others.
3) When you catch your ego out-of-balance, you offer love and compassion to yourself, with accountability and apologies to others if needed.
4) Whatever you know, you hold in balance with unknowing, along with the reverence that all is ultimately mystery.
5) You operate from a place of gratitude and humility knowing everyone is a student, even the Dalai Lama.
I encourage you to keep healing your ego with unconditional love and compassion and infinite regard. Doing so will help our society and world regain its balance too, so that (to rephrase a well-known and oft-quoted prophet),
"Every valley shall be lifted up and every hill made low, and the glory of the Divine shall be revealed in all."
Next time: Healing your Thoughts
To schedule a healing session or intuitive spiritual consultation with Monica call her at 206-306-1144, email her at monica@monicamcdowell.com or for more information, check out her website at www.monicamcdowell.com
Copyright © 2009 by Monica McDowell, MDiv. All Rights Reserved. This entry may be linked, forwarded, or copied in its entirety as long as this paragraph is included and there is no profit gained by doing so. Monica is an energy healer, spiritual director, minister, and author of My Karma Ran Over My Dogma: Lessons Learned by a Whistle-Blowing Minister Turned Mystic. She has the distinction of being the first ordained minister in the United States ever granted civil rights in a federal ruling.
Part 3 in an ongoing series on healing the ego
What weighs more: a ton of bricks or a ton of feathers?
We all know the answer--they weigh the same, but the mind's tendency is to vote for the bricks. What looks and feels like a weightier substance should have more value on the scale--even with all things being equal.
This is the same error the ego makes again and again with regard to a person's value. The person who looks or seems weightier/of more import is of more value, even though "we know this truth to be self-evident that all people are created equal" to quote our country's Declaration of Independence--with more equal gender language.
(Note: Even though our society has this ideal, in reality it is way out of balance here. For example, compare the wages of sports stars with teachers.)
But this belief--that all are equal--is exactly the tool needed to balance your own ego. The corollary--that everyone's gifts are also equal--is also a helpful belief. These beliefs are about value not about equivalency. I am not exactly the same as you. I have my unique gifts; so do you. But by nature we all have a divine spark and the same Source of genius, and therefore, we--and our gifts--are of equal value in the unfolding universe.
These beliefs are easy to assent to as ideals, but in practice our minds tend to make the bricks-over-feathers error. Here are ten quick tips to help you catch yourself and rebalance your own ego:
1) If you notice someone else's ego is bothering you, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: we are of equal value.
2) If you notice you are envious of another's success, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: we are of equal value.
3) If you notice yourself thinking that you are better or worse than someone else, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: we are of equal value.
4) If you don't think it's important to look for ego/shadow within, start looking at the part of you that thinks that--it's from ego/shadow and heal that part of you with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: We all have egos/shadows and we are all loved infinitely.
5) If you find self-disgust, self-hate, or self-denigration within, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: I am of infinite value.
6) If you find yourself exalting another or denigrating another, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: we are of equal value.
7) If you find yourself evaluating your gifts in comparison to another, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: all gifts are of equal value.
8) If you find yourself thinking that you are at a higher or lower spiritual/energetic level than another, heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: all paths and levels are of equal merit.
9) If you find yourself thinking, "I'm right and they're wrong," heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: everyone is right and everyone is wrong.
10) If you find yourself thinking, "I'm the expert here. My gifts trump theirs," heal your own ego with unconditional love and compassion and the affirmation: everyone is an expert of something and all gifts are of equal value.
Okay, so you're seeing a theme here, right? The work is always to heal the ego with unconditional love and compassion. Then the balanced ego can easily and gently move into trans-ego, for when the self (small s) knows its infinite, eternal value, when its own genius is validated, and when it is receiving a never-ending supply of unconditional love, then, of course, nothing matters! Of course, all is well! Of course, I can merge/dissolve with All That Is. Of course, because it's all One, it's all Love. Of course, of course, all are equal, because all is Self (large S)!
When you can let go of comparing yourself and evaluating others, life becomes joyful and free. You live knowing everything and everyone is a blessing and a gift. What a great way to live!
Here are 5 signs of a healthy and healing ego:
1) Whatever qualities you regard in others (love, beauty, generosity, genius, special, etc.), you regard in yourself in equal amounts.
2) Whatever regard you give to yourself is also given in equal regard to others.
3) When you catch your ego out-of-balance, you offer love and compassion to yourself, with accountability and apologies to others if needed.
4) Whatever you know, you hold in balance with unknowing, along with the reverence that all is ultimately mystery.
5) You operate from a place of gratitude and humility knowing everyone is a student, even the Dalai Lama.
I encourage you to keep healing your ego with unconditional love and compassion and infinite regard. Doing so will help our society and world regain its balance too, so that (to rephrase a well-known and oft-quoted prophet),
"Every valley shall be lifted up and every hill made low, and the glory of the Divine shall be revealed in all."
Next time: Healing your Thoughts
To schedule a healing session or intuitive spiritual consultation with Monica call her at 206-306-1144, email her at monica@monicamcdowell.com or for more information, check out her website at www.monicamcdowell.com
Copyright © 2009 by Monica McDowell, MDiv. All Rights Reserved. This entry may be linked, forwarded, or copied in its entirety as long as this paragraph is included and there is no profit gained by doing so. Monica is an energy healer, spiritual director, minister, and author of My Karma Ran Over My Dogma: Lessons Learned by a Whistle-Blowing Minister Turned Mystic. She has the distinction of being the first ordained minister in the United States ever granted civil rights in a federal ruling.
